The mother accused of trying to starve her 12-year-old daughter to death testified yesterday that she was too "ashamed and afraid" to seek help for the child.

Denise Wright said she depended on her estranged husband, co-defendant Melvin Wright Jr., for money and other assistance while she and her daughter, Indigo, stayed inside their Kina'u Street apartment, rarely venturing outside.

When food grew scarce, Wright said, she would feed Indigo macaroni and cheese or potatoes "one or two times a day."

Melvin Wright told her "he was doing the best he could" when she said there wasn't enough food in the house, she said.

When Indigo turned 11, Denise Wright said she could see that the girl was losing weight.

"I would see it in her size, her face," she said. "I was scared."

The two spent their days in the apartment, watching television and talking, said Wright.

She said she was "ashamed to go outside, ashamed of people seeing my daughter and the way she looked."

Wright said she herself ate mostly "junk food" like cookies and chips that her husband brought to her, but didn't ever notice that she was losing weight.

She said Melvin Wright, who was living elsewhere with another woman, did not appear to suffer from weight loss either.

In May 2006, Wright said, her brother-in-law and sister-in-law visited the apartment. Alarmed by Indigo's frail condition, they bought groceries and offered to help the Wrights obtain medical care for the child.

But Wright said she and her husband never filled out the insurance forms.

"I was waiting for Melvin to help me," she said.

During cross examination, the prosecutor, Maurice Arrisgado, said, "Neither of you lifted a finger to help her."

Wright responded, "I tried to do the best I could."

On Jan. 7, 2007, Indigo was lying on her bed and barely responded when her mother said good morning to her, Wright testified.

"She said 'hi' but really soft, like a whisper," Wright said.

"I gave her macaroni and cheese. She ate a little bit," the mother said.

Later in the morning, the child was "unresponsive" so Wright called and text-messaged her husband, she said.

He arrived at the apartment a half-hour to an hour later and tried to feed his daughter and got her to drink a small amount of water, Wright said.

Then he used his cell phone to call 911 about 1 p.m.

When paramedics arrived, they found the girl near death, lying sideways on the bed with her eyes rolled back in her head.

She was taken to Kapi'olani Medical Center for Women & Children for emergency treatment. According to the state, Indigo weighed just 29 pounds — nearly 50 pounds less than average for a child her age.

Dr. Victoria Schneider, a pediatrician and child abuse expert, said the girl was near death when she arrived in the emergency room.

Indigo suffered brain damage from malnourishment. She is now living with her grandparents in South Carolina.

Denise Wright lost all parental rights to Indigo but said yesterday she loves her daughter "unconditionally."

On Valentine's Day last year, she said, she received a card from Indigo.

After Wright wrote a letter to her mother in South Carolina that said, "I would give anything to hear my daughter's voice," she was able to speak with her on the telephone.

"She said, 'I love you, Mommy. I miss you,' " Wright said.

"I was in tears," she said.

Since then, they have spoken four more times on the phone and write to each other regularly, said Wright.