LOS ANGELES — Those lucky Dodgers, leading a charmed life and enjoying outrageously good fortune.

The Dodgers thought they were playing the Cardinals in the 2009 NL Division Series.
Instead, the Chicago Cubs showed up again.
Last October, the Dodgers swept the Cubs in three games, swiftly but cruelly destroying the inflated hopes of a cursed franchise. It was predictable.
This October, the Dodgers have a chance to sweep the Cardinals, who have inexplicably turned into the Cubs, right before your disbelieving eyes. And that was unpredictable.
Do not adjust your HD TV sets at home, and do not throw any hard objects at those television screens: These aren’t really the Cubs; they only look like it. They are the Cardinals, striking out and dropping balls and loitering on the bases and blowing saves and going all Leon Durham ’84 on us in an epic meltdown.
Except that there is no curse in St. Louis today.
Only curse words.
And there is no billy goat haunting the Cardinals.
But Matt Holliday is turning into the goat of this bizarre NLDS.
Thursday, the Cardinals had a win in Game 2 loaded up and ready to transport back to St. Louis. It was the bottom of the ninth inning. The Cardinals had stood on the shoulders of their tenacious and brilliant starter, Adam Wainwright, long enough to barely squeeze a 2-1 lead from their veins. The Wainwright curve ball was awesome for eight innings; he displayed the best hook in LA since Kareem Abdul-Jabbar played for the Lakers.
There were two outs, with no runners on. Dodger James Loney hit a routine line drive to left field. This was it, third out. The Cardinals were somehow going to survive 48 hours of offensive ineptitude to win a game and take a 1-1 series back to Busch Stadium.
In a few seconds Dodgers fans would be streaming to the parking lots for the drive home.
Except Holliday, playing left, had a GPS malfunction. He lost track of Loney’s game-ending out.
“I couldn’t see the ball,” Holliday said. “I lost it in the lights.”
Holliday fumbled away the third out. Loney ended up on second. And closer Ryan Franklin had his own little Southern California earthquake, getting swallowed up in a winning Dodger sequence of walk, game-tying single, another walk and game-winning single.
Dodgers 3, Cardinals 2.
“Tough to swallow,” Holliday said.
Evidently.
“I feel terrible,” he said.
Undoubtedly.
Agent Scott Boras may feel even worse.
“The ball hit my stomach,” Holliday said.
And stomachs turned throughout St. Louis.
After freezing in Game 1 by taking three consecutive strikes with the bases loaded and no out, and after offering a tribute to Chris Duncan with the ninth-inning error in Game 2, Holliday is not exactly giving Cardinals chairman Bill DeWitt Jr. a reason to succumb to the free-agent demands of Boras.
Is Holliday the only Cardinal wearing the Cubs’ hat in this series? Well, of course not. And Holliday did homer to give the Cardinals a 1-0 lead in Game 2. He also left a runner in scoring position with a ground out in the third. And that was the theme for the second consecutive game.
The Cardinals were 0 for nine with runners in scoring position Thursday and flunked at numerous chances to open up a comfortable lead for Wainwright. In the first two games, they’re three for 22 with RISP. That includes Brendan Ryan’s 0 for five, Yadier Molina’s 0 for three and Holliday’s 0 for two. If that weak batting average with RISP keeps up, it’ll be RIP on Saturday.
Dodgers manager Joe Torre has neutralized Albert Pujols, and none of the hitters who follow Pujols in the lineup are giving Torre a reason to regret his tactics.
And then there’s Franklin. Yes, Game 2 should have been snapped to a close by Holliday’s glove. Yes, Franklin was a victim of some bad luck. But he also caved after Holliday’s misplay. In his last 15 appearances, dating back to Aug. 23, Franklin has allowed 36 base runners in 13·innings, has been racked for a .357 batting average, and has blown four saves in 11 chances.
In losing 16 of their last 23, the Cardinals have scored three runs or fewer 14 times. In the 16 losses, they’re hitting .197 with runners in scoring position. It isn’t pretty.
The Cardinals come home to St. Louis now. They’re in dire circumstances as they walk into Busch Stadium for Game 3 on Saturday. The comeback begins with these two steps:
1. Quit impersonating the Cubs.
2. Win a game. Survive.
It’s all they can do.
Oh, and one more thing: catch the ball.