Let’s preview the bowls, the editor said.

There are 34 of them, starting Saturday. He might as well have said, “Let’s collapse this king-size air mattress and put it in this cigar box.”
Nevertheless . . .
New Mexico
Albuquerque, N.M., Fresno State (8-4) vs. Wyoming (6-6), Saturday: Ex-Washington player and Gary Pinkel aide Dave Christensen got the Cowboys bowling in his first year. Fresno’s Ryan Matthews leads the nation in rushing, so Christensen could have a long day.
St. Petersburg
Rutgers (8-4) vs. Central Florida (8-4), Saturday: George O’Leary is still coaching UCF. Imagine how history would be different if he hadn’t doctored a resume for the Notre Dame job in 2001. The Irish wouldn’t have hired Tyrone Willingham, nor, very likely, would Washington in 2004.
New Orleans
Middle Tennessee State (9-3) vs. Southern Mississippi (7-5), Sunday: MTSU seeks its first bowl victory. It’s the fourth time in this bowl since 2004 for USM.
Las Vegas
BYU (10-2) vs. Oregon State (8-4), Tuesday: It will have been only 19 days since Oregon snookered OSU for the Rose Bowl berth. The key might be whether Mike Riley, 5-0 in bowls with the Beavers, can snap his team from that hangover and get a pass rush against Max Hall.
Poinsettia
San Diego, Utah (9-3) vs. California (8-4), Wednesday: Who among us understands Cal, blown out in four Pac-10 games? Jahvid Best is out for the Bears, who could use him against a program that has won eight straight bowl games.
Hawaii
Honolulu, SMU (7-5) vs. Nevada (8-4), Thursday: Not since Texas oilmen were stuffing C-notes in Ponies’ pockets back in the ’80s — auguring the NCAA death penalty — have they been bowling. SMU coach June Jones goes back to his Island roots against a Wolf Pack team with three, yes, three 1,000-yard rushers.
Little Caesars Pizza
Detroit, Ohio (9-4) vs. Marshall (6-6), Dec. 26: The schools are separated by only 80 miles and the Ohio River, which might not be enough to pique your interest. Bobcats seek their first bowl victory.
Meineke Car Care
Charlotte, N.C., North Carolina (8-4) vs. Pittsburgh (9-3), Dec. 26: Pitt’s lost its past three bowls, Carolina the past two. Panthers’ hotshot freshman back Dion Lewis runs up against Tar Heels’ ninth-ranked rushing defense. Coaches Dave Wannstedt and Butch Davis are NFL expatriates.
Emerald
San Francisco, Boston College (8-4) vs. USC (8-4), Dec. 26: Trojans are like the two-headed calf at the state fair, an object of great curiosity. Will they care enough about this to prepare well? Looks like a defensive struggle.
Music City
Nashville, Kentucky (7-5) vs. Clemson (8-5), Dec. 27: Give it up for ex-Oregon coach Rich Brooks, a step removed from a pink slip a few years back now looking for his fourth straight bowl victory with the Wildcats. Do-everything marvel C.J. Spiller of Clemson probably should have received more Heisman acclaim.
Independence
Shreveport, La., Texas A&M (6-6) vs. Georgia (7-5), Dec. 28: Bulldogs capped a restless season by firing three defensive coaches. Meanwhile, it’s A&M that allowed 47, 49, 62 and 65 in four games. Who said college football makes sense?
EagleBank
Washington, D.C., Temple (9-3) vs. UCLA (6-6), Dec. 29: Honk if you attended Temple’s last postseason game — the 1979 Garden State Bowl. The Owls won nine straight after an 0-2 start, but you’d think Pac-10 athletes would prevail here.
Champs Sports
Orlando, Fla., Miami (9-3) vs. Wisconsin (9-3), Dec. 28: Miami wings it with QB Jacory Harris. Wisconsin’s latest pounder off the assembly line is John Clay, who rushed for 1,396 yards. We’re not figuring Tiger Woods will drop in from nearby Isleworth.
Humanitarian
Boise, Bowling Green (7-5) vs. Idaho (7-5), Dec. 30: Vandals need to remove the taste of a closing three-game losing streak and 113 points surrendered in the final two. One problem: Idaho is 114th in pass defense, and BG’s Freddie Barnes led the nation with 138 catches.
Holiday
San Diego, Arizona (8-4) vs. Nebraska (9-4), Dec. 30: Forget everything you ever knew about scoreboard-stressing, high-octane Holiday Bowls. This one, a rematch of ’Zona’s 23-20 bowl triumph in 1998, figures to be a headbanger. And nobody bangs heads quite like Nebraska nose tackle Ndamukong Suh.
Armed Forces
Fort Worth, Texas, Air Force (7-5) vs. Houston (10-3), Dec. 31: So nice, they played it twice; same teams, same bowl as in ’08, a true tortoise-and-hare matchup. Air Force’s No. 1-rated pass defense goes against Houston’s top-ranked pass offense led by QB Case Keenum.
Sun
El Paso, Texas, Stanford (8-4) vs. Oklahoma (7-5), Dec. 31: If Andrew Luck plays for Stanford (broken finger), it’s a lot more interesting. Sooners’ seventh-rated run defense gets a snootful of Toby Gerhart. Oklahoma has been lousy lately in bowls, losing five of six.
Texas
Houston, Missouri (8-4) vs. Navy (8-4), Dec. 31: Navy threw 96 passes this season; Mizzou’s Danario Alexander caught 107 balls. Besides Navy QB Ricky Dobbs, a 1,000-yard rusher, watch Tigers’ OLB Sean Weatherspoon, a projected first-round NFL pick.
Insight
Tempe, Ariz., Minnesota (6-6) vs. Iowa State (6-6), Dec. 31: Just try to find something nice to say about this. ISU has the nation’s 75th-best offense, Minnesota 113th. Gophers primo receiver Eric Decker is out with a foot injury, and there’s been unrest over the status of Minny coach Tim Brewster.
Chick-fil-A
Atlanta, Virginia Tech (9-3) vs. Tennessee (7-5), Dec. 31: Surely, Lane Kiffin can pack in one more controversy before year’s end. Tech is keyed by QB Tyrod Taylor, 14th-rated passer nationally. Vols have runner Montario Hardesty and top-10 NFL pick Eric Berry at safety.
Outback
Tampa, Fla., Northwestern (8-4) vs. Auburn (7-5), Jan. 1: Auburn’s the better team, but it had an uneven season after a 5-0 start. Northwestern QB Mike Kafka has more than an evocative name; he was second-team All-Big Ten.
Gator
Jacksonville, Fla., Florida State (6-6) vs. West Virginia (9-3), Jan. 1: Hoist one to outgoing Bobby Bowden, who coaches in his 33rd and final bowl game (and FSU’s 28th in a row). But Seminoles’ 108th-ranked run defense can’t afford to get misty; WVU’s Noel Devine rushed for 1,297 yards.
Capital One
Orlando, Fla., Penn State (10-2) vs. LSU (9-3), Jan. 1: PSU accomplished remarkably little this year, losing by double digits at home to both Iowa and Ohio State. Les Miles’ LSU teams have throttled four straight bowl opponents, twice as an underdog.
Rose
Pasadena, Oregon (10-2) vs. Ohio State (10-2), Jan. 1: Watch to see if Ohio State’s fifth-ranked run defense has any more success slowing the Ducks’ mercurial spread-option offense than Pac-10 foes did. Oldsters might recall this matchup in the 1958 Rose Bowl won by the Buckeyes, 10-7.
Sugar
New Orleans, Cincinnati (12-0) vs. Florida (12-1), Jan. 1: This has the same scent as the Alabama-Utah game last year, the SEC team coming off a huge disappointment. But Cincinnati is amid a coaching change, Florida has three projected first-round draftees — cornerback Joe Haden, defensive end Carlos Dunlap and tight end Aaron Hernandez — and Tim Tebow is playing his final college game.
International
Toronto, South Florida (7-5) vs. Northern Illinois (7-5), Jan. 2: What does this do to the U.S. trade deficit? USF coach Jim Leavitt has spent a good chunk of his time explaining away allegations that he struck a player. NIU’s Chandler Harnish completed 66 percent of his throws.
PapaJohn’s
Birmingham, Ala., Connecticut (7-5) vs. South Carolina (7-5), Jan. 2: UConn was resilient in the wake of the shooting death of cornerback Jasper Howard, finishing with three straight wins that followed three losses by a total of 10 points. Huskies have Jordan Todman’s 1,152 rushing yards, Gamecocks the better defense.
Cotton
Arlington, Texas, Oklahoma State (9-3) vs. Mississippi (8-4), Jan. 2: Preseason AP rankings had Ole Miss eighth and OSU ninth; now they’re vying for lesser-disappointment honors. Oke State’s sixth-ranked run defense gets a look at Dexter McCluster, who shredded Tennessee for 282 yards.
Liberty
Memphis, East Carolina (9-4) vs. Arkansas (7-5), Jan. 2: ECU’s Skip Holtz is a coach widely rumored to be moving up, but so far, it’s been a skimpy job market. Pirates’ 110th-ranked pass defense will be severely tested by Arkansas’ Ryan Mallett, who has 29 touchdowns and just seven interceptions.
Alamo
San Antonio, Michigan State (6-6) vs. Texas Tech (8-4), Jan. 2: If it were a year from now, the Pac-10 runner-up would be in San Antone under a new deal. Anybody left to suit up for the Spartans after two players were booted and eight suspended for involvement in a campus fight? Not that Tech coach Mike Leach is apt to show mercy.
Fiesta
Glendale, Ariz., Boise State (13-0) vs. TCU (12-0), Jan. 4: Prosser’s Kellen Moore, first-team All-America by SI.com, puts his 39-3 touchdown-interception ratio against the nation’s top-rated defense. If the winner here does it impressively, look for more catcalls against the BCS.
Orange
Miami, Iowa (10-2) vs. Georgia Tech (11-2), Jan. 5: Iowa was a can-do team all year and is 5-2 in bowls under Kirk Ferentz. QB Ricky Stanzi is back off a leg injury, hoping to avoid All-America end Derrick Morgan, maybe the best pass-rushing end in the next NFL draft. Tech’s triple-option nets 307 rushing yards a game.
GMAC
Mobile, Ala., Troy (9-3) vs. Central Michigan (11-2), Jan. 6: CMU’s Dan LeFevour, who has 12,510 career passing yards, might like Troy’s 100th-ranked pass defense. Steve Stripling is Chippewas’ interim coach, after Butch Jones split for Cincinnati.
BCS title game
Pasadena, Alabama (13-0) vs. Texas (13-0), Jan. 7: Lots to like here, including eight first-team AP All-Americans (five for ’Bama) and the first meeting of 13-0 teams in a championship game. Will Texas, begrudging opposing rushers a scant 62 yards a game, repel Heisman winner Mark Ingram? Will the ’Bama defense do to Texas’ Colt McCoy what Nebraska did in the Big 12 title game? From here, it looks like your bowl bacchanal ends with a ’Bama victory, oh, about 24-16.