Think before speaking to avoid foot-in-mouth gaffes
By Dawn Sagario
Have you ever been asked a gratingly inappropriate question by a co-worker?
Listen to Dale Cyphert's cringingly delicious tales she's heard of various blundered inquiries, and you'll probably feel better.
The associate professor of management at the University of Northern Iowa in Cedar Falls shares one tidbit passed on to her about an exchange between two work colleagues:
Worker No. 1: What's wrong with you today? Did you forget to take your meds?
Worker No. 2: How did you know?!
Worker No. 1: Oh, man!
Another snafu involved one of Cyphert's female friends who shaved her head. Cyphert said her pal went bald for the convenience — she was a busy mom working on her Ph.D., and she didn't want to fuss with her hair.
Cyphert said that's when people began asking her friend: How are your cancer treatments going?
Workbytes, with the help of a trusty podmate, came up with these other gems sure to bolster team spirit:
Sure, we all suffer from occasional foot-in-mouth disease — we accidentally make a disparaging remark at a party, or unintentionally diss someone while chatting at church.
But making these flubs at work, where we have to work with someone day in and day out, can exponentially increase the amount of stress it puts on a person, Cyphert said. The mortification can be increased manifold when what were seemingly innocuous questions can be construed as sexual harassment or infringing on health privacy laws.
Also at stake: Trust.
Colleagues have to have a level of trust where they can work together, criticize each other and make mistakes, Cyphert said, while still knowing at the end of the day they're still on the same team.
"Those social relationships have a huge impact on work trust that the organization has," she said.
"It's not trivial. The issues of trust are huge."
Cyphert said these gaffes require patience, recognizing when we need to apologize, and forgiveness. "You have to give people credit for being stupid once in a while, and get over it."
One way to avoid this embarrassing situation? Think before speaking. Yeah, it sounds so stupidly simple, but obviously it doesn't hurt to be reminded of it.
So, next time, take a second and think before mentioning to a co-worker, "That's a nasty looking bruise on your neck. Is that a ... ?"
