Everyone seems to think that being busy is a really good thing. Just listen to the response you get after someone asks how you are. If you say, "Busy," they say, "Wow, that's great!" or "Good!" And it's not just a neutral "Good." It's said with excitement — sometimes tinged with envy — as if being busy means you must be successful and probably making lots of money.

The other day, a man who was 15 minutes late for a meeting that had been scrunched into a half-hour time slot asked me how much time we had. When I said I had 15 minutes before my next meeting began, he said, "I'm glad to hear you're so busy."

That's not the point, I wanted to say. It's that I had another appointment and I choose not to be late.

Why is everyone so glad to hear you're busy? Every survey I read and every worker I talk to provides an indication that people would rather not be that busy themselves. Yet they seem to think everyone else is lucky if they are.

In part, the response is about social norms. When people ask how you are, they expect to hear, "I'm fine."

"Our social greetings are questions that we don't actually want answers to," says Carolyn Kaufman, professor at Otterbein College. If you say, "I'm busy," they say "Good," because they were expecting, "I'm fine."

But I sense something more to this "I'm-glad-you're-busy" phenomena, and it needs to be examined. For one thing, it perpetuates the thinking that being busy is a good thing because it means you're successful, well thought of and must be in demand. Not necessarily.

The impression that being busy is a good thing is associated with being productive, living hard, working hard and making money, says Kaufman. Sloth seems to have become our No. 1 deadly sin, she adds. And it's killing us — heart disease, the leading cause of death in the U.S. is associated with stress.

Yet balance between work and life outside of work is a priority for most everyone. More than 90 percent of workers age 25 to 64 said this is an issue for them in recent Work+Life Fit Reality Check research. But more than half said they have not discussed how to achieve more balance with their supervisor.

What stops them? Forty five percent said they might make less money; 32 percent said the boss will say no; 32 percent said even if the company has flexible work programs, it really isn't OK; 29 percent said others will think they don't work as hard; 29 percent said they might lose their job.

True, in today's workplace, bosses, clients and co-workers expect you to be there when they need you. And with all our electronic gizmos, it's nearly impossible to come up with a feasible reason for not knowing someone is trying to reach you, says Kaufman. People who turn off their electronics "are less likely to be respected for wanting peace than they are to have to deal with anger when they finally reconnect to the electronic world."

Others will keep you as busy as you let them. Your own conscience, though, can be a harder slave driver than any outside force, adds Kaufman. When will you take time to listen to it and figure out what kind of work and life you really want? First, you'll have to stop being so busy and pay it some mind.