The √ indicates admission is $5 or less, or free. Full-price admission is listed; * denotes discounts (or free) for students, seniors, military, members, children and/or advance purchase. Call venue for details.

STAGE

"Pageant," off-Broadway musical spoof on beauty contests, 8 p.m. today-Saturday and 4 p.m. Sunday, Manoa Valley Theatre; sold out. Call 988-6131 for information about wait list.

"Mobster in the Men's Room," mystery dinner-theater, three-act play with three-course meal, doors open at 6 p.m., show at 7 p.m. Saturday, The Showroom at Dave and Buster's; repeats Aug. 12 and 19; $34.95*. 589-2215.

"Sylvia," adult-oriented comedy about a man who falls in love with a dog, 7:30 p.m. Thursdays-Saturdays and 4 p.m. Sundays, through Aug. 13, Yellow Brick Studio; $15*. 550-8457.

COMEDY

Sharkey's Comedy Club, featuring sex/relationship therapist Kevin Hughes, 8 p.m. today-Saturday, seating at 7:30 p.m.; Panama Hattie's, 'Aiea; $15. Also: Bo Irvine's comedy competition, sign up at 7 p.m., show at 8 p.m. Thursdays; $5. Also: the Best of Honolulu's Stand-Up comics and Mainland guests, doors open 7:15 p.m., show at 8 Saturdays. $15*. 531-4242.

MUSIC & DANCE

√ Na Leo Lani Sweet Adelines Chorus, weekly rehearsals, 6:30 p.m. Tuesdays, Saint Francis School; free. 944-3373.

√ Royal Hawaiian Shopping Center entertainment: Josiah Kekoa Trio, 6:30-8:30 p.m. Tuesdays and Saturdays; Soundettes of Hawaii, 6:30-8:30 p.m. Wednesdays; Pu'uhonua, 6:30-8:30 p.m. Thursdays; Ku'uipo Kumukahi, 6:30-8:30 p.m. Fridays; free. 922-2299.

√ Ala Moana Center entertainment: Honolulu Dance Studio, 4 p.m. Saturday; Young Champions International Show Teams, noon Sunday; Kunamoto-Ken Suisogaku Renmei wind ensemble, 2 p.m. and Royal Hawaiian Band, 4 p.m. Wednesday; Keiki Hula Show, with Halau Na Mamo O Ka'ala and Kanilau, 10-11 a.m. Sundays; Polynesian Cultural Center, noon-12:45 p.m. Tuesdays and Thursdays; free. 955-9517.

√ Pearlridge Center entertainment: Uptown — Ma'ohi Nui Polynesian Dance Troupe, 7-8 p.m. today; Terry Brown Ukulele Studio performance, noon-1 p.m. Saturday; First Sunday Fete, noon-1 p.m. Sunday; Downtown — Ho'okahi Leo, 6-8 p.m. Saturday; From Keiki to Kupuna, 10:30 a.m.-noon Tuesdays; Uptown and Downtown — Baba Alimoot and Friends, 11:30 a.m.-1:30 p.m. Fridays; free. 488-0981.

√ International Market Place entertainment: Halau Kumana, 7-9 p.m. today; VIPs, 7-9 p.m. Saturday; Greg and Junko, 7-9 p.m. Sundays and Tuesdays; Voyage Through Polynesia, 8:30-9:15 p.m. Mondays, Wednesdays, Thursdays; free. 971-2080.

Pau Hana Fridays, weekly summer series with live local music, dinner specials, and access to the park's most popular rides, 7-11 p.m. Fridays, Hawaiian Waters Adventure Park; $20*. 674-9283.

√ Windward Mall entertainment: Wind Wind Orchids showcase and sale, 10 a.m.-3 p.m. and The Gymnastics Connection, 2:30 p.m. Saturday; free. 235-1143.

√ Aloha Tower Marketplace entertainment: Gymnastics Connection, noon and Pau Kapele Halau O Hula, 2 p.m. Saturday; Oahu Line Dancers, 2 p.m. Sunday; Star of Honolulu Welcome Hula Show, 4:30-5:30 p.m. daily; free 'ukulele lessons, 2:30-3 p.m. Tuesdays; free. 566-2337.

√ Kuhio Beach torch-lighting and hula show, 6:30-7:30 nightly, Kuhio Beach stage, near Duke Kahanamoku statue; free. 843-8002.

√ Salsa Saturday, party, lesson, and entertainment by DJ Rod el Moreno, 9 p.m.-midnight Saturdays, Dream to Dance; $5. 734-0264.

FAMILY TIES

√ Toddler Storytimes, ages 2-3, 10 a.m. Mondays, Kapolei Public Library; free. 693-7050.

√ Chess lessons and practice competition, 6-8 p.m. Tuesdays, Pearlridge Center Downtown (488-0981); and 6-9 p.m. Wednesdays (lessons 7-8 p.m.), Windward Mall (235-1567); free.

Explore!, quilt-making, tours and living-history stations, 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Saturdays, Mission Houses Museum; free with museum admission ($10* general, $8* kama'aina). 531-0481.

Twilight Tours, 5:30-7:30 p.m. Saturdays, Honolulu Zoo; 5 and older; $12*. Reservations: 971-7195.

ETC.

√ R/C Drift Practice Nights, electric drift cars welcome, 8 p.m. Tuesdays, Costco Iwilei parking lot (rain location: Ala Moana Center lot, near Sears and Zippy's); free. www.driftsession.com.

√ Introduction to the Hawaiian Language, with Germaine Kaleolani Haili, 8:30-9 a.m. Wednesdays, Native Books/Na Mea Hawai'i; free. 783-2612.

√ Japanese Design Today 100, exhibit featuring everyday objects of Japanese lifestyle, 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Tuesdays-Saturdays, Japanese Cultural Center of Hawai'i; free. 945-7633.

Hockey on Horseback, with interaquad games and entertainment, gates open at 11 a.m., game at 2 p.m. Sundays, Mokuleia Polo Fields; $7*. 637-8401.

√ Brown Bagging to Hawaiian, learn conversational basics, beginners 11 a.m.-noon Wednesdays and advanced 11 a.m.-noon Mondays, 'Iolani Palace, Old Archives Building; $5*. Register: 522-0824.

Tour and Tea, explore the galleries, learn about art and culture and socialize over a glass of tea, 2:30-4 p.m. Tuesdays and Sundays, Honolulu Academy of Arts; $7*. reservations required 532-8700.

√ Youth Speaks Hawai'i, slam poetry workshops for ages 13-19, 4-5:30 p.m. Wednesdays, The ARTS at Marks Garage; free. 387-9664.

√ Strolling Tableside Magic, with Alan Arita, 6:30-8:30 p.m. Wednesdays, and with Glen Bailey, 6:30-8:30 p.m. Fridays, Makino Chaya, Westridge; free. 486-5100.

Aloha State Backgammon Club, weekly tournament, 6:30 p.m. Fridays, Coffee Talk; $10 entry donation. 294-7475, 922-2674.

FAIRS & FESTIVALS

√ Craft Fair, 9 a.m.-2 p.m. Fridays, Waikiki Beach Marriott, Paoakalani Lobby; free. 922-6611.

√ Sunset Country Market, sponsored by North Shore Country Market, 8 a.m.-2 p.m. Saturdays, Sunset Beach Elementary School; free. 237-8248.

√ Artfest, 9 a.m.-5 p.m. Saturdays-Sundays, Queen's Surf Beach, Waikiki; free. 696-6717.

√ Waimanalo Country Market and Crafts Fair, produce, arts and crafts, clothes, jewelry, plants, 9 a.m.-4 p.m. Sundays, Waimanalo Homestead Community Center; free. 259-5349.

NATURE

Foster Botanical Garden guided tours, 1 p.m. weekdays. Reservations: 522-7060.

√ Tropical Plant Walk, 10 a.m. Saturdays and 1 p.m. Sundays, Ho'omaluhia Botanical Garden; bring walking shoes, insect repellent and rain gear; free. Reservations: 233-7323.

√ Weekend Fishing, catch and release, 10 a.m.-2 p.m. SaturdaysSundays, Ho'omaluhia Botanical Garden; bring poles, small barbless hooks, nonlive bait, insect repellent, walking shoes, rain gear, water and picnic lunch; free. 233-7323.

Petroglyphs, Waterfalls and Rainforest Trek, walking tour in Nu'uanu Valley to Kapena Falls and other sites, Saturdays-Sundays; presented by Hawai'i Geographic Society; $15. Reservations: 538-3952.

Garden Walking Tour, one-hour guided 1-mile walk through a botanical garden, 10:30 a.m. and 1 p.m. daily, Senator Fong's Plantation and Gardens, 47-285 Pulama Road, Kahalu'u; $14.50*. 239-6775.

TOURS & ATTRACTIONS

√ Native Hawaiian Crafts Workshops, including lei making, stone carving and quilting, 10 and 11:30 a.m. Mondays-Saturdays, Bishop Museum; free. 847-3511.

Ola Na Mo'olelo series, Hawaiian history storytelling, 1:30 p.m. weekdays, Bishop Museum; free with museum admission of $14.95*, or kama'aina $7.95*. 847-3511.

'Iolani Palace Grand Tours, 1 1/2-hour tour of the galleries and barracks, every 30 minutes, 8:30 a.m.-2 p.m. Tuesdays-Saturdays; $20* ($15* kama'aina). Galleries tour only: $10*. 522-0832.

√ Hawai'i Theatre docent tours, includes performance on a 1922 organ, 11 a.m. Tuesdays; $5. 528-0506.

Mission Houses Museum Tours, 11 a.m. and 1 and 2:45 p.m. Tuesdays-Saturdays; $10* ($8* kama'aina). 531-0481.

Chinatown Historic and Cultural Walking Tour, presented by Hawai'i Heritage Center, 9:30-11:30 a.m. Wednesdays and Fridays; meet at 1040 Smith St.; $10*. 521-2749.

Hawaiian Quilting Classes, 1-3 p.m. Wednesdays with Mary Cesar, Mission Houses Museum; also, 10 a.m.-noon Saturdays with Wilma Connell; $7*. Reservations: 531-0481.

Ghosts of the Old Plantation, ghost stories with tour, 6:30-8 p.m., Hawaii's Plantation Village; $40. 306-7631.

√ Aloha Friday King's Jubilee, with flag ceremony, precision rifle drill and musical revue, followed by fireworks, 7 p.m. Fridays, Hilton Hawaiian Village; free. 949-4321, ext. 77881.

√ Komo Mai to the Courtyard, with keiki hula and Tahitian fire-knife dancer, 7:30 p.m. Fridays, Sheraton Moana Surfrider; free. 931-8383.

√ Na Ali'i, 2-hour cultural walking tour of Waikiki with Hawaiian storyteller Woody Fern, 9-11 a.m. Saturdays, Outrigger Reef on the Beach, Hoaloha canoe; free. 924-6007.

"Grossology: The (Impolite) Science of the Human Body," traveling exhibit that explores the body, 9 a.m.-5 p.m. daily through Aug. 27, Bishop Museum; $14.95*. 847-3511.

Poakalani Hawaiian quilt classes, 9:30 a.m.-noon Saturdays, 'Iolani Palace, Old Archives Building; $5 plus materials. 524-0394.

Hawaiian Railway Train Rides, 1 and 3 p.m. Sundays, 91-1001 Renton Road, 'Ewa; narrated, 90-minute roundtrip to Kahe Point; $10*. 681-5461.

Ocean Drifters, seasonally rotating exhibit of jellyfish, 9 a.m.-4:30 p.m. daily, Waikiki Aquarium; $9* general, $6 kama'aina. 923-9741.

"Journey With a King," exhibit exploring the cultural and historical ties between Hawai'i and Japan, 9 a.m.-5 p.m. daily, Bishop Museum; $14.95*. 847-3511.

Chinatown Museum Walking Tours, Chinatown and harbor or Capitol district, 10 a.m.-noon daily, Hawaiian Chinese Multicultural Museum and Archives, Maunakea Marketplace; $10. Reservations: 595-3358, 374-3094.

√ Changing of the King's Guard, snap and precision rifle drill exhibition, 6:15 nightly, King's Village Shopping Center; free. 926-7890.

Summer Moonlight Cruise, with Island-style music and pupu, 8:30-10 p.m. nightly, Navatek I; $35-$58*. 973-1311.