On Aug. 26, 2005, John Newcomer left his 'Alewa Heights home to pick up dinner at McDonald's, not even a mile away. He was supposed to return before the 6 p.m. news.

But just as he was pulling into his driveway, John, a diabetic, suffered a massive stroke. His black Pontiac barreled down the road, out of control, and plowed into a van carrying four passengers. John, 55, was pronounced dead at the scene.

"I just miss him, period," said his widow, Gayle, 54. "I keep thinking he'll come home."

John's death marked the end of a tragic — yet remarkably touching — love story that began nearly 20 years earlier.

As Gayle tells it, their marriage was marked by health troubles and family responsibilities. But the hardships were balanced with an unwavering dedication and sacrifice.

HALLOWEEN DATE

In 1986 John took a security job at the Kahala Hilton Hotel, where he met Gayle, who worked in accounting.

One of John's daily duties was to escort Gayle between the accounting office and the cashier's main vault.

At the time, the twicedivorced Gayle wasn't interested in John at all.

"It just didn't click," said Gayle, who now works at the Hawaii Prince Hotel Waikiki. "He wasn't my type."

When Halloween came around, though, John's boss played matchmaker, convincing Gayle, who was dressing up as Dolly Parton for the company party, that John should pose as her bodyguard.

During the party, John gathered up the courage to ask Gayle out on a date. She said yes.

With two daughters from her previous marriage, Gayle was hesitant about dating. But John's sincerity and generosity eventually won her over.

"He did everything for me, from the first time we met," Gayle said. "He wanted to protect me. If he heard on the radio that something was happening in accounting, he was the first one there."

They dated for about two months before John popped the question, taking Gayle completely by surprise.

"I told him I didn't plan on getting married again," Gayle said. "To me, this was too fast."

It took several weeks before Gayle gave him her answer, but by the time she did, she had changed her mind. She said yes.

Since this was John's first marriage, he wanted Gayle to wear a white wedding dress at the ceremony.

"I told him that if he wanted me to wear white, we'd have to get married on Halloween," Gayle said, laughing. "So we did."

The couple was married on Oct. 31, 1987, exactly one year from their first official date, at the Kahala Hilton Hotel.

That first night together, Gayle said, could've been a sign of things to come.

She was sick, running a 103-degree fever in their hotel room in Waikiki. John spent that evening searching for saimin for his new bride.

"We should've known what kind of marriage this was going to be," Gayle said.

Their life together was marked by challenges.

About a year into their marriage, Gayle suffered from encephalitis, a brain inflammation. Then three years later, doctors found a slow-growing tumor in her brain, which had been causing constant headaches.

She spent a week in the hospital after surgery, and John never left her side.

"John was there through everything," Gayle said.

HEALTH CHALLENGES

Friends would refer to Gayle and John as peanut butter and jelly. They were perfect together, they said.

"We were always together," Gayle said, smiling.

Their weekend ritual: going out for breakfast.

They were regulars at Times Coffee Shop, the old Wisteria Restaurant, Big City Diner and the Original Pancake House in Kalihi.

They also shopped for wine at Tamura's in Kaimuki every weekend and traveled to Las Vegas at least once a year.

Wherever they went, John made friends.

"He really touched people," Gayle said.

But a lot changed in 1990.

After Gayle had a brain tumor removed, the Newcomers moved out of an apartment in Liliha they shared with one of Gayle's daughters. The couple bought a two-bedroom condo in Kailua, which they shared with Gayle's other daughter.

That same year, Gayle's father died of leukemia at 79, leaving Gayle's mother home alone in 'Alewa Heights. Not long afterward, she was diagnosed with early Alzheimer's.

As the years went by, Gayle's mother needed more care. To be there for her, the couple sold their Kailua condo in 1996, taking a nearly $60,000 loss, to move into the 'Alewa Heights home.

That didn't bother John at all, Gayle recalled.

"To him, it was OK," Gayle said. "That was his reaction to everything, 'OK, cool, whatever.' He was the most easy-going person. Nobody has ever seen him upset."

For about eight years, they took care of Gayle's mother, seeing her through failing health, including congestive heart failure and several small strokes. Though they had help from a caregiver a few times a week, the difficult work took its toll.

"It was so stressful and we kept it all inside," said Gayle, who had lost 118 pounds and much of her hair from the stress of caregiving. "We were both getting physically ill."

In addition to the brain inflammation, Gayle has lupus and rheumatoid arthritis. John had type 2 diabetes, high blood pressure and high cholesterol.

Both worked full time and didn't exercise regularly.

Through it all, though, Gayle said they kept optimistic.

"We never lost sight (of the idea) that we would someday be able to live our life together and do the things that we missed (those) eight years," Gayle said. "We always thought we'd grow old together and move to Canada."

By now Gayle was working at the Hawaii Prince Hotel Waikiki. And John, who was a Honolulu Police Reserve officer for two decades, had become an investigator in the Honolulu prosecutor's office.

In 2004, Gayle's mother moved into a nursing home. Visiting her — "the shell of a mother who once was," Gayle said — was hard.

The next year, John died in the accident. Gayle's mother passed away two months later.

Married for 18 years, the Newcomers never realized their dream of living in Canada.

"It still doesn't make sense," Gayle said.

Gayle hasn't gotten used to life without her husband. She still expects him home at 2 p.m. and waits by the window for him to pull up in his Pontiac. Up until a few weeks ago, before she starting packing up the house to move, everything of his was still in its place.

"I'm coming to acceptance, but it's still so difficult," Gayle said. "I regret that I didn't get to say goodbye. ... I wish I told him that I loved him more. He told me that all the time."

Still grieving, Gayle doesn't think she'll find anyone who could replace John in her heart. But she hopes her story will remind other couples to appreciate what they have.

"I miss him every waking hour of every day, and that's the way love should be," said Gayle, who wears John's badge and wedding ring around her neck. "My wish to all the couples who are still together is never forget how much love you share ... I was very fortunate to have the one true love in my lifetime, however short. And I thank God for that."

Reach Catherine E. Toth at ctoth@honoluluadvertiser.com.