Last month Diane (Han) Goo opened a scrapbook filled with Christmas cards, old photos and letters she used to pass to her friends in class.

Then she found a mimeographed flyer. The purple lettering reads, "Let's Go to the Hop" — a dance sponsored by her group of friends back at Roosevelt High School that funded their own graduation party.

She thrust it at her pals, now all 50 and sipping chardonnay, at a recent get-together at the Hawaii Prince Hotel.

"Look at this!" Goo said, laughing.

These 10 women have been friends since intermediate school, when they formed a social club (the name of which they today find too embarrassing to reveal) that continued through high school.

Since graduating in 1974, they've reunited for dinner and drinks at least once a year — usually in January for an annual post-Christmas party — to reminisce about surfing at Concessions or playing trumps in the cafeteria.

The group's favorite memory: a junior-year trip to Maui, where they stayed at a secluded camp — it cost only $1 a night — and swam in shark-infested waters.

"We were almost killed!" said Charlyn (Wong) Morris, who lives in San Francisco. "As a mother now, I'd never let my child do what we did!"

For more than three decades, this eclectic mix of friends — some married, some divorced, some with tweens, some with grandkids — have found comfort and support in their long-term friendship.

They laugh, cry, complain and reminisce together about everything from husbands to haircuts.

"It seems like no matter how much time has passed, when we get together, it's the same," said Goo, who runs her own business out of the Hawai'i Kai home she shares with her husband and two sons. "I think that's a sign of a good friendship. When you get together, it's like old times again."

DON'T FORGET ME

Not everyone is as fortunate as Goo.

According to a recent study published in the American Sociological Review, Americans have fewer close friends and confidants than 20 years ago, signaling that people are living lonelier, more isolated lives.

In 1985, the average American had three people in whom to confide important matters, reported the study. Last year that number dropped to two, and one in four had no close confidants at all.

The culprits: We spend more time commuting and at work, and less time socializing and connecting with others.

Lack of social interaction — particularly for women — can take a toll, physically and emotionally.

"Women tend to use their friendships as real support ... It can be group therapy," said Dr. Diane Thompson, director of the cancer center program at The Queen's Medical Center. "It does take a lot of work, but it's worth it, especially for women who tend to thrive on friendships."

Research has shown that people who have stronger ties with supportive friends are not as stressed, less likely to be depressed, better at recovering from illnesses and more likely to ward off the common cold.

"The toll of long-term isolation and having no support can put people at risk for feeling depressed and sad," Thompson said.

Ann (Tagawa) Ching, 50, remembers feeling lonely — and missing her friends — when she moved to Arizona in 1985.

With her husband going to school full time, Ching was left alone in a new city without any family or friends nearby.

"Like anything else, it was a new experience ... but it was pretty lonely," Ching said. "It was very hard in the beginning."

Though she's made good friends in California, where she lives now, Ching looks forward to coming home and seeing her classmates from Roosevelt High School.

"There's such a difference," said Ching, who keeps in touch with her gang mostly through e-mail. "We have such a different kind of friendship. There's more history. My friends up here are great, but they'll never be the friends back home."

As Ching discovered by moving away, long-term friendships can enhance your life in ways that go beyond just having someone to hang out with on a Friday night.

"They know so much about you; you're not starting new," said Thompson, who visits her best friend of 20 years in Pittsburgh. "It's that growing together over time. Like in a relationship between a husband and wife, it certainly changes over time. But it can grow to be stronger. These are the people you can just give a certain look, and they know exactly what you're thinking."

STAY SWEET

That's certainly the case for many groups of friends in Hawai'i, where the island culture and geographic isolation seem to cultivate these lifelong friendships.

When Jane Chung, 26, tells her friends about her mom cleaning the house, they all start laughing. No explanation needed.

"I can just picture her mom cleaning and crack up," said JoAnne Wong, 25, laughing. "For her to clean is a miracle!"

Wong and Chung met as freshmen at Maryknoll School — actually, on the bus to Kane'ohe. They quickly became surfing buddies.

It didn't take long for Chung to be embraced by Wong's other group of Maryknoll friends, including Erika Ching and Kristina Chang, whom she's known since kindergarten.

The foursome has been inseparable since, despite their diverse personalities.

Chung is a free spirit who loves the ocean and could easily be on "Survivor."

Wong is a devout Christian straight-talker who wants to travel the world and critique the food.

Ching, 26, is a voracious reader and vegetarian who you can call crying about a breakup at 2 a.m.

Chang, 26, is the charismatic social butterfly who chats up strangers and will do almost anything just for the experience.

Yet they all get along.

"We're different people, but for some reason it works," said Ching. "It's hard not to think of them in my life. I wouldn't be this person without them."

"Yeah," added Wong, "these are the people who have journeyed with you your whole life."

These four friends talk about everything from boyfriends to careers to their most recent shopping splurge.

But what makes this friendship work — and has made it last so long — is their unwavering loyalty and unconditional support.

Wong planned a big surprise birthday party for Chung in January. Ching brings dinner to Wong when she's working late. Chang and Chung talk on their cell phones every morning. And everyone showed up for the funeral of Ching's grandmother last year.

They're so close they even swap clothes.

Wong calls her friends the "non-negotiable bridesmaids."

"No matter what, we'll still love each other and it's forever," Wong said. "There's no turning back."

KEEP IN TOUCH

It's a challenge to maintain friendships over the years.

People get married, have kids, move away, change jobs and find new distractions that take them even further away from social interaction.

That's life, experts say, and it takes work to keep a friendship going, particularly for multitasking women.

"Our lives have become terribly complex and our aspirations have grown significantly ... People feel like they don't have enough time to do it all, so they make compromises," said Keith Ferrazzi, a relationship expert and author of "Never Eat Alone: And Other Secrets to Success, One Relationship at a Time." "Relationships are perhaps the most important key to your long-term success and happiness in everything you do in life."

Putting in the effort can pay off. Ann Ching should know: Her long-time friends helped her get through one of the most difficult times of her life.

In 1989, she was diagnosed with severe aplastic anemia, a rare blood disorder, and was given a 50 percent chance of survival.

The first person she called was Morris, who had just given birth six weeks earlier in San Francisco.

Without a second thought, Morris jumped on a plane to be by her friend's side.

"I remember thinking, 'How am I going to live without my best friend?' " Morris said. "I had to be there. You don't have time to think about it. You just do it. You drop everything and go."

While in the hospital, Ching got a conference call from her high school pals back home.

"They were all chattering," Ching said, laughing. "And I cried. It was so touching. You'd never expect to be in that situation and just hearing their voices, that really cheered me up."

Ching has returned the favor to Morris during their decades-long friendship.

When Morris called her at 2 a.m. after her first contraction, Ching flew to San Francisco and was at the hospital that morning.

And when Morris needed someone to serve her husband divorce papers this year, Ching didn't hesitate.

"That's what a friendship is," Morris said. "You don't think about it."

NEVER CHANGE

There are few groups of friends like the Ngee Tung Oi Hui. (Translation: Girls Friendship Club.)

These nine women have been friends since starting the social club — complete with uniforms — at Stevenson Intermediate School in 1939.

Now in their 80s, they still meet at least four times a year, trying out new restaurants and reminiscing about growing up in simpler times.

They've been through every major milestone in life together, from weddings to graduations, from anniversaries to class reunions.

They've even endured the death of one of their close friends, Alma (Ching) Lum, more than 30 years ago.

"That was hard," said Pauline (Tseu) Young, 81, of Manoa, who still visits Lum's grave. "I often think about her."

When they get together, the memories flood back: riding their bikes around Makiki, eating hot fudge sundaes at Stewart's Pharmacy in Kaimuki and standing in line at the grocery store to get rationed food during the war.

It was a time of blackout curfews, bomb drills and gas masks.

For these women, the war became the backdrop for their friendship, which has lasted more than 65 years.

"As you get older, you don't have too many friends," said Alma (Char) Yee, 80, of Pacific Heights, who's known Young since kindergarten. "This coming together helps us a lot."

The four twentysomething Maryknoll alumnae hope to grow old together, too.

They'll be bridesmaids in each other's weddings and aunties to each other's kids.

And no matter how busy they are, they hope they'll still meet for coffee or a surf session or a round of pick-up basketball.

"We're in this for life," Chang said, smiling.

Reach Catherine E. Toth at ctoth@honoluluadvertiser.com.